As I began to blockade and divert my mind from spiraling into these pools of emotions, the Holy Spirit began to convict me of where God has taken me through this current season of life...
In this season, God has open an entirely new paradigm and lens of what defines faith. For many, faith is a term of ambiguity and abstraction. We are frustrated at the concept or (cop-out) of "you just need to have more faith". This just doesn't settle right for the majority, and I believe there is a reason why this is so. Faith is not some abstract or ambiguous concept awaiting its intricacies and complexities to be solved. More importantly, faith is our Identity.
Let's think back to the stories of faith that have become posters of faith inscribed throughout the Old Testament. The epic stories of "David and Goliath", Shadarach, Meschack, and Abendego", Daniel, and many others. We have defined these stories over the centuries as having exemplary faith experiential moments. Yes, these men and women of God have decided to act out in faith in trusting their Father in heaven to be there protector, provider, and stronghold. If we were to look deeper into these incredible stories of faith we would find the true meaning and definition of what faith is. Their faith was not just an action, it was their IDENTITY. You see, When David walked up to Goliath David knew that there was not an ounce of talent/strength in him that could take down this giant. This was an obvious unequivocal truth to David. However, David knew that he was no longer identified in himself. Yes, David was identified in the God Most High. This is where his entire identity rested. In this knowledge, David knew that God would prevail in any circumstance. As we look throughout the faith stories of the Old and New Testaments it is this very concept of faith/identity that we begin to see.
Correspondingly, we look to the New Testament and find this very theme of faith. "It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me, And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me" (Galations 2:20). This is our very identity. We need to wake up and realize this incredible life-changing reality, that we no longer live, but Christ lives inside of our very body. We live, move and breath through Christ and in Christ. Unavoidably, this is who we are. We simply need to realize this.
As I lay there the Holy Spirit had shook me to the core. I had forgotten my identity. How can I be afraid of failure and my insecurities when it is no longer I who live? Christ lives in me, and with this knowledge I know that God will guide my footsteps into where I need to go and what needs to be done. Ultimately, I am a tool in the toolbox of God's gloriously magnificent Kingdom reigning/coming here on/to earth.
Thanks be to God. May His glory be revealed through His children.
